a little bit of a distraction...

I haven't written here in such a long time, although I've been old school writing in a spiral notebook because my writings were a bit more personal than I felt comfortable revealing. My journey these past months have been testing my ability to stay focused on the tasks set before me.  And the latest distraction is happening today.

Wednesday, I went to a quarterly doctor checkup to look into the fibroids I have growing in me for the past 19 months.  I have them tended to every 3 months. Last September, I had surgery to remove them.  They keep returning.  Doc said to me this one can't be dealt with in the office, must be surgically removed as soon as possible.  My head spins for a moment and I catch myself. No need to worry until they give you something to worry about. I've been in this situation before.  I'm not going to be distracted by this.  I'll deal with it as it comes.

I had decided to keep this event quiet because people tend to react to my distraction as if it is their distraction.  I know others love and care for me, but in my line of work, people look to me for counsel and I can't carry them through my distraction.  Then, others made this part of my life public yesterday...so I share some of my thoughts here.

I head to surgery this afternoon.  My schedule has been uprooted for this week, which is a distraction for me.  I'll find out to what degree my schedule will be uprooted for the future next week, which is a distraction for me. 

I'm glad to know that this distraction will not take me off of the path that has been laid out before me, before I was born.  I know there is a plan and a purpose for this season. I want to stay focused on who I am through this season.  I know there can be some beauty in this distraction.  I'm anxiously awaiting the great reveal of this one!

I focus on Romans 15:13 (which I have shared with so many of my friends in difficult times this summer) I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.

I am confident with hope and I do have peace...except the unsure feeling that the nurse putting in the IV can find the right place to start it all...ugh

 

10 focused on the giants & 2 remembered the promise

Long ago I promised the ancestors of Israel that I would give this land to their descendants. So be strong and brave! Be careful to do everything my servant Moses taught you. Never stop reading The Book of the Law he gave you. Day and night you must think about what it says. If you obey it completely, you and Israel will be able to take this land. (JOSHUA 1:6 CEV)

Recently I've been struggling with the places I know I'm supposed to serve. There have been trials and battles and roadblocks. I know I am supposed to hang in there and be obedient. Sometimes it's just so hard.

Last night I got to engage in a worship service where the point were to hear God's direction, be obedient and He would do the impossible. I so very much want to see God change lives all around me! So I made a new commitment that no matter what happens around me I will be obedient to what He has asked me to.

A friend came to pray with me and give an encouraging word-remember when the 12 spies went to the promised land-12 saw giants and 2 decided to look also at what God promised. They still saw the giants but they didn't focus in them. They focused on the promise of God.

Then today's verse of the day came up, which just happens to be my life verse, which is listed above. It is the matching orders given by God to Joshua to enter the Promised Land-be strong and courageous wherever you go!

I will focus on the promise not the giant! Thank you God!